Friday, April 25, 2014

Let's talk about S*X baby... My Struggle With PCOS

Okay, to start off, if you know my husband and I personally, you may not want to read this blog. It is written more for the other couples struggling with this journey right along with us

Yes, it is a little personal, but it is a fact that to get pregnant, you must have sex. Unfortunately, when you are TRYING to get pregnant, it can become the very last thing you want to do. 

There is nothing sexy about scheduled sex. There is nothing romantic about shoving a couple of pillows under your ass and laying like that for 30 minutes afterwards. There is nothing fun about having a splitting headache, but knowing that to get the thing you want more than anything in the world, you must follow your schedule! And it defiently isn't fun when you want to, but is hasn't been 48 hours, and your afraid to mess up the  count. Did I mention there is nothing sexy about scheduled sex? 

People will tell you to 'just relax' or 'quit trying so hard' or 'just have fun'. And if you are like us, you have tried all of those things. Unfortunately, relaxing isn't easy and the fun went out the window a while ago. 

You can have as healthy of a sex life as you want and some way, some how, infertility will disrupt that. Maybe not for long, maybe not that often, but at some point you will think 'can't we just get this over with?' That is perfectly okay. It's honest and it's true.

Some will obsess about it (like me), and your husbands will have to remind you that they are not just a donation bank. Which they aren't! They are your husbands. They are your best friend, your partner, your lover. Not some piece of meat to be used and abused! 

If you need to, read all the articles you want. Find out the best time of day, the best position, any tricks other women have used. Read it all. Lord knows I have. It might help you and it might not. 

At the end of the day, the thing that will get you through all of this is the bond you share with your husband. So add the fun back in, make sure to romance each other and throw your schedule out the window! (No, no don't do that! You do need that!) But, do what is the most cliche thing to say, and relax! No, laying in bed with a couple of pillows shoved under your ass and your legs in the air is not fun. It's not sexy and it's not romantic. But I have laughed harder and had more deep, intellectual talks with my husband in those 30 minutes than I have any other time in our relationship and to me, that is fun, it is sexy and it is defiantly romantic! 

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