Driving

You know, my whole driving life I have never been good at it. I have tried to say that I just speed bu that doesn't mean that I am a bad driver. Well, I am finally coming to the conclusion and finally admitting to myself that I am a terrible driver.  I chalk it up to every thing else in my life that I'm not good at, I just don't have time! HAHA

But seriously, I constantly see accidents everywhere because people do not pay attention and that is just my case. I dont pay attention at all. I am usually messing around with my phone, or digging through my purse or staring at people. Its such a bad habit and even though I am so conscience of it, I don't do anything about it.

Well. from now on I am going to start making a conscience effort to pay more attention because I understand that a car is a dangerous piece of equipment and I need to be more responsible.

So for all my haters my whole life....I am finally admitting that I am a BAD driver!! Terrible to be exact!

Things I want to do

So, there are alot of things that I have wanted to do for a while that I just havent done. Partly because of money and partly because I didnt really have anybody who wanted to do it with me.

For instance I love going on road trips. I love staying in hotels and I love just experiencing fun, new things. I can be a homebody at times, but I really just love to get out and do something.  Now that I have a job that gives me amble PTO to take time off work, I am making sure that this year, and from here on out I do the things that I want to do no matter if I end up doing them alone or not!

For starters, I have always wanted to go to Galena, IL. I have heard that it is a beautiful town and I have always just wanted to have a romantic weekend there. So I paid for one. Now we just have to have a weekend to go!

I have also been wanting to go to Chicago forever. I love the city, I love the atmospher, and I love getting away. So for Nathans birthday in July we will be going to Chicago and going to a White Sox/Cubs game! It will be soo much fun!

I really want to go to a nice lake somewhere this summer as well and stay in a cabin. We used to do stuff like that when I was a kid all of the time and I miss it. I like the outdoors when I want to be out there. (haha) I love floating on a tube in the lake and just kicking back and relaxing. A nice fire at night to roast some marshmellows is always fun too!

I also would like to take a trip to the Kansas City area soon! I too love that city and would prefer to go in the summer so we could go to Worlds of Fun/Oceans of Fun. But we will see! I like going to Royals games too down there!!

Well, there is a bit of a list of things that I would like to start doing. The way I look at is is I'm young, there is no better time then now to do all of this stuff, so why not do it??

Being Proactive

So the company that I work for, The CBE Group, paid for our entire company to go through a program by Franklin Covey called 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. There are 7 Habits that seem like common sense, but they aren't easy. The first one is "Being Proactive".  Lately I have struggled with this a lot because what exactly is being proactive. In each situation it can mean a different thing. We just had a Covey Booster last week that I went through about Being Proactive, and the instructor said that people who sit back and do nothing can be just as ineffective as people who always jump up to do something. I would say that I am a reactive person, and it some sense I am a proactive-reactive person in my own mind, but when the situation is all said and done, I was really just a reactive person and didn't make the situation any better at all.

There is a part that they tell you to give yourself a "wedgie" before you react so that you can sit and think before you say something that you will later regret. I have started to do this a lot with my sister and my mom. I often times just end the call to give myself to give me a wedgie so I dont say anything that we all know I WILL regret later. The bad part about this, is that I am not being proactive about the situation and I am just giving myself more time to come up with something even more mean to come back the next time I talk to them. Yes, this is terrible and its not helping anything at all.

So, I really took to heart what I've learned and been told thus far, and I have realized that this "proactive-reactive" attitudue that I think I have is really just a reactive attitude and I need to realize what I need to do to become a more proactive person.

So...if you know me and my quick mouth...here goes nothing!!

Ruining surprises!!!!

Ok, so never before in my life have I been good at keeping surprises. I just have a big mouth and I like to tell everything that I know. If you are part of my life, you just have come to realize this, or you dont tell me anything. Either works for me!

Welllll, the hard part about this is now having a boyfriend and getting him things. His birthday isnt even until July and he already knows what he is getting. Also, I told him this weekend what I was getting him for Valentine's day and he gave me my present!!

I keep saying that I want to be completely surprised when I get proposed to...but lets be real, we all know that I want to know every little detail!

I hope I cant talk him into telling me when it comes time! I'm pretty persuasive...I mean I am a debt collector!!

WWWWHHHHYYYYYY????

I would like to think that I am not a very jealous person. Actually I would like to say that I'm not a jealous person at all. Of course when really great things happen to people there is that little bit of everyone that says "ahh I'm jealous", but mine is usually out of pure happiness for that other person. I really try and live my life loving every minute of it, because its mine, and its something no one else can have. That in itself is enough reason to live my life for me!

I do understand that there are alot of jealous people out there, and I honestly feel bad for them. It must be so terrible to live life always wishing you had something else, or you were in a different situation. You are shorting the people in your life, but most of all you are shorting yourself out of a great life, yours!

The thing with this is that, lately I have become a jealous person. I see something or hear something about certain people or situations and it just makes me so mad inside. I ask myself "why?" quite a bit. First and foremost, WHY AM I GETTING JEALOUS?? I never have before, EVER! I even had a boyfriend that prided himself on hitting on anything that was near him, even if i was right in front of him, and I never ever ever got jealous. Some might say its because I didn't care as much about him. Which might be true. But this feeling sucks.  I have also been asking myself, why would you do that? Why do other people continue to live their lives day end and day out if they are so unhappy. Its your life you can change it to be whatever you want it to be. 

This is probably not making a lot of sense, because it doenst to me. All I know is that I have this feeling that I get, I hate how I get it, and I hate that it even exists. I am not a jealous person, AT ALL. I want to go back to not having these feelings. But until then, I will suck it up and realize that I care alot about the people in my life in the moment that I am in and maybe that is why I am finally feeling this awful feeling. 

Things that bother me lately

Sorry in advance if this offends anyone.

Lately, for some reason, a lot of things that never used to bother me have REALLY started to annoy me. To the point where I just need to get it out.  Here are a few of those things, hopefully I feel better when its done.

First--People who share a facebook page with their spouse. This doesn't bother me as much if only one person uses it, but when people flip back and forth between users and you can't really tell who it is. My opinion, not that you asked for it, is that if you are BOTH going to use facebook, then please, have your own facebook.

Second--People who thank God for EVERYTHING. As most people know, I am not a believer. So to me, it is quite annoying, but I get that some people need to believe to get through their day and that is fine. But really, you don't need to thank god for letting you take a shit that day. Quite frankly, it is science that allowed you to take a shit.  Or the thing that annoys me the most is "I'm not going to worry about money, because god will provide." No. The way you will get money is by getting off your ass and getting a job. This is the same mindset of people who are getting government assistance. "Why work when the government will provide". I am sorry but if one more person on the phone tells me they will pay their bill when God provides it to them. IT IS DUE NOW.  Sorry, but when you sign up for a service you know there will be a bill due, if you don't have the money, then why would you sign up?? 

Third--WRONG NUMBERS. If you know me, then you know that I have a phone job. So here is a little advice for people. If your number is getting called and it is a wrong number, simply say "wrong number" when the person asks you for a better number, because trust me, they will. Say "I don't know that person"  If you say "they aren't available" the person will call back. When I ask you for a better number and you say "wrong number" again. You aren't answering my question. I get that it is a wrong number, I am trying to find a better number to contact them.

Fourth--BITCHES.  Seriously, I have met more bitches in the last few months then I have ever met in my life. And if you knew me back in high school, you know how big of a bitch I was. But these people take the cake. It is ridiclious that decisions that I make in my life are like front page news these days.  Its annoying that rumors get started about such exciting news as being engaged, when its not true at all. I fell like when I finally do get to announce that I'm engaged it wont be as special, because everyone already thought I was.

FIFTH--IGNORANT PEOPLE. Lately I have also bet a lot of ignorant people. It should be no surprise that a lot of these people are people from number 4 as well. But anyways, here is my thing. Choosing not to educate yourself in todays world is the stupidest decision that you can make. There are so many things going on in the world and decisions that are being made that will directly affect not only our own future but our children's direct future. I think that as a person you need to be so aware of these things to make decisions about your family and your own future choices. I just could not imagine not being educated and choosing to be ignorant yet these people openly admit that they are ignorant and they love it...quite stupid if you ask me.

Anyways, that is enough for today. I feel a little better!!

Who am I when you're not looking?

Wow!! I heard this song for the first time the other day and it is ME!! I cant believe it!! Well maybe not the "you're so good looking" thing, but all of the little quotes in between are ME!!!




My, oh, my, you're so good looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends
But I've not tasted all you're cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking

Do you pour a little something on the rocks
Slide down the hallway in your socks
When you undress, do you leave a path
Then sing through your nose in a bubble bath

My, oh, my, you're so good looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends
But I've not tasted all you're cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking

I want to know, I want to know, I want to know

Do you break things when you get mad
Eat a box of chocolate cause you're feeling bad
Do you paint your toes cause you bite your nails
And call up mama when all else fails

Who are you when I'm not around
When the door is locked and the shades are down
Do you listen to your music quietly
And when it feels just right are you thinking of me?

I want to know, I want to know, I want to know

My, oh, my, you're so good looking
But who are you when I'm not looking




And all I have to say is that I am sooooo happy that I have found somebody who knows exactly who I am when he isnt around, and he loves me anyways! Because trust me... I do A LOT of things that would make a person think twice when everyone isn't around.  Such as when I'm sick, I stick kleenex up my nose and sit around the house so I dont have to blow my nose! :)